Be the Miracle

I'm not sure if this should be in my bipolar blog or my music/movie blog but I'm pretty sure I can work it into this one.. I have a way of spinning things and seeing them in a different way these days. It's something I have learned as the mother of a bipolar child. Look for small miracles, little blessings, learn to believe in things, find faith in places you don't normally look.
I have always had a "relationship" with the moon and water (so to speak). I am able to find peace and a calmness anytime I am on or near the water. It's something I have always been able to feel. On the water, watching it rain, etc. The moon has always held a special place in my life. It's the one constant thing and no matter where you are in the world, you can always see it. You know that if you are apart from someone or missing someone, they can look up at the moon and see the same thing you do. Closing any space or distance between you. It's also calming and peaceful.
As the mother of a bipolar child or any mother who has a special needs child, you know that you need to find faith or a higher power to believe it. You can believe in God and not be religious, You can find faith and spirituality in a higher power or in nature.. Find something. Having faith, hope and a belief in something greater than yourself if a very strong tool in overcoming stress, anxiety and coming so close to the edge you just want to give up. Ask for help, look for guidance, pray to God. Look for small miracles in every day. Count the smallest blessings and celebrate any victory no matter how big or small.

The weird thing about this is how this blog idea formed in my head.. J and I were watching Bruce Almighty and Evan Almighty yesterday. Both are really cute movies and they have a good message. In Bruce Almighty, God takes a break and lets Bruce play God.. Since he thinks he can do better. He was angry at God for not answering his prayers. At first Bruce uses his new powers to right the wrongs in his life and then just does a blanket "yes" answer to all incoming prayers without even listening to them. Things go wrong and even the things he tried to fix in his own life, fell apart and didn't work out as he'd planned. At the end of the movie God tells Bruce... Parting your soup is not a miracle Bruce, it's a magic trick. A single mom who's working two jobs, and still finds time to take her son to soccer practice, that's a miracle. A teenager who says "no" to drugs and "yes" to an education, that's a miracle. People want me to do everything for them. What they don't realize is *they* have the power. You want to see a miracle, son? Be the miracle.
God may not answer your prayers the way you want him to. But be patient. Be the Miracle you are looking for. You may not get the answer you want but there is always an answer. You may just have to look harder for it.
Even Almighty- God seeks him out to build an Ark and his family and co workers all think he's gone crazy. He ran for congress with the promise to Change the World. So as he builds the Ark, the animals show up, media shows up and all the townspeople come to watch. Basically, it starts to rain and then it stops, so no flood. But then a dam breaks that was built by a corrupt politician.. blah blah blah but the point of this one is: God: How do we change the world?
Evan Baxter: One single act of random kindness at a time.
God: [spoken while writing A-R-K on ground with a stick] One Act, of, Random, Kindness.
Random acts of kindness can change the world. It may not be saving the whole world from a flood but it can be a small thing that can change your world. (Bringing me back to my starfish story of course.. Can't change the world but you can make a difference for that one). Ask for help, listen to others, be nice. Be there for a mom or a child who is struggling. Understand what they are going through. Be a support system, be a friend. Be kind to the children, be a positive role model. Don't judge them. Don't presume to understand if you can't. Smile, say hello, offer to help even if you are not asked. You could make the difference in someones day. This goes for anyone. Any situation. No matter what.

I started reading a book last night called "Now I see the Moon." It's written by a mother who adopted a toddler child from Russia to later discover he was Autistic. Her friends and family tried to encourage her to send him back. He may have been adopted but that is her child. Not something you can send back because it's defective. I'm only about half way through the book but as a little girl she had imaginary friends and spoke to the moon every night. Had a secret language that she would write on her windows so the moon could see it. Once she was a mother, she sought out the best doctor on the other side of the country, she defied the schools, gave up a lot of her life because her child could not function in social settings that he was not comfortable in. Some of her family members had trouble connecting with him but that is what her purpose in life came to be.. connecting with her child. Not conforming him to "routine behaviors." When he wants to spin around the room, she spins with him, instead of telling him to stop. When he wants to bang on pots int he kitchen, she turnes it into a small parade or concert. She embraces his "quirks." When he obsessed over things, she would mimic him and he would eventually stop and move on to something else. It's a really good book and I hope to finish it soon.
But for now.. Be the Miracle and try and at least do one random act of kindness each day. For yourself, for your child or even a complete stranger! With the book, so far I've learned, maybe unconventional is a possibility. Who decides what is normal or routine behaviors and why can't you turn a pot banging session into a parade around the house? Find something that works for you, believe it in and Go for it!